I'm just me

We Have a Dog

2007-07-18T21:19:00.000-05:00

D and I now have a dog. He's too big to be a puppy (around 110 pounds), so he is definitely a dog. His name is Guillermo. I don't think he quite knows what to make of his new home yet, but he'll adjust. We got him from a friend our ours who couldn't keep him.

That's all for now.

The Elephant in My Brain

2007-06-08T19:03:00.000-05:00

When May started, I had a very clear little niche writing here. I knew roughly what I was going to say here and what topics I wanted to avoid. Then came the excitement of people misunderstanding what D was saying and fighting out of an odd sense of loyalty to me and putting me between my extended family and the family I've created with my husband. I got to see how much my family closes ranks when they feel attacked.

And after that stopped, with only partially being cleared up, there was an elephant put into my brain regarding this blog. Now, when I try to write anything here, I freeze up and find it hard to say anything.

So, I'm going to use this blog to update the family about big events in my life, things like moving, pregnancy, etc. But it won't be updated very often otherwise. Because the elephant that doesn't belong to me won't let me write much on here anymore.

TTFN!

We're Home

2007-05-29T13:22:00.000-05:00

D and I made it safely back from Tampa. Then I slept for 11 hours. I wish I could say it was a wonderful vacation, but it was only okay.

I did get a lot of reading done. I read several Sherlock Holmes stories and the latest issue of Reader's Digest.

Well, I need to go have lunch and go to the chiropractor.

TTFN!

Greetings from Florida

2007-05-23T19:37:00.000-05:00

D and I have made it safely to Florida for his conference. Tomorrow I should be able to get us into the type of room we actually reserved (they ran out of rooms with king sized beds before we got here).

Other than that, there isn't much to say.

TTFN!

A Lazy Day

2007-05-20T21:42:00.000-05:00

Today, D and I had a rather lazy day of mostly watching movies. We were happy with 3 of them, and disliked only one which we didn't fully watch. It's been nice to have time off to just fully relax, because I will be very busy for the next few weeks.

We did go out to lunch, but we ended up having really bad service. Which was very frustrating. And the restaurant was out of two of the items D wanted (a cinnamon roll and chocolate milk). It was the worst service we've ever had at that place.

I'm going to go enjoy my movie now.

TTFN!

Spending the Day with the Laundry

2007-05-18T21:59:00.000-05:00

So, today was spent washing, drying, folding, and putting away the laundry. I also spent some of the day watching courtroom shows, which I think goes well with laundry. It's been a slow day. I also watched yesterday's CSI tonight (I was doing something else last night). I'm now looking forward to next season to start.

I need to get back to reading Catch 22. But that probably won't happen for a little while. At least tomorrow. But I should be able to read all day tomorrow, I think.

I'm going to relax now.

TTFN!

Back in Business

2007-05-17T22:30:00.001-05:00

After taking a week and a half off, I'm back. And I have at least one amusing story to tell.

Yesterday, D and I went to go look at a house about 4o minutes away from ours. When we got to where it was supposed to be, the only thing we found was an empty lot with a mail box at the street (there was a little concrete walk too). D talked to the neighbor and found out it had been torn down about 6 months ago. On the plus side, we got to tell the guy who was wanting to sell it that it was no longer standing (he hadn't seen it in a long while). The owner is thinking of deeding the lot back to the city, because he can't do anything with it.

I've been spending a lot of time reading lately. D and I went to the library Monday and Tuesday this week. I checked out a book on Monday and returned it when we went back Tuesday. Then I checked out two more books. I really enjoyed the one I read Monday, but was disappointed with one of the two books I checked out Tuesday. The other book, which I am still reading, is Catch 22. On our way to see the house, I read the first chapter out loud to D. We discovered that I like it and he hates it, which is common apparently.

Other than that, I've kept myself busy with laundry and movies. If you are looking for a good romantic comedy, I would recommend The Holiday. It's funny, but mostly sweet. I want to get it someday.

I guess that's all for now.

TTFN!

On a Break

2007-05-06T21:22:00.000-05:00

I'm taking a break from my blog for a little while. I don't know when I'll be back. I just need some time off.

TTFN!

Buying a Swimsuit

2007-05-04T17:34:00.000-05:00

For the first time in my life, I have dreaded going and getting a swimsuit. This year is the first time I have to try to cover up my more than ample chest and minimize my waist line (which is larger than I'd like). Having said that, I got my swimsuit for our trip later this month to Florida yesterday. Then D made teased me for not wanting to spend $6 on sandals that were made to match my swimsuit (I got a nice pair at Wal-Mart for under $3). He pointed out that I had no problem spending money in another store on stuff that could be considered unnecessary, but wouldn't spend $6 (that we could easily afford) on shoes to match my swimsuit. I do, however, need to toss a pair of sandals that I've got that are old and worn.

We also got me a nice beach towel for our trip too (I should only be going down to the pool, but I need a towel for that). I figure I will get 2, maybe 3, days of quiet time around the pool before there may be vacationing people there with their kids. And I probably won't go down to the pool if that is the case. I can stay in the quiet of the hotel room and relax up there. I'll just open the curtains to let the sunshine in.

I'm going to go. I think I've run out of things to say for right now.

TTFN!

What is selfishness?

2007-05-03T12:35:00.000-05:00

This post written by D.

It has suggested that I apologise to Beth for the comments that I made on her blog, especially for calling her selfish. Well, I will apologise for not having sufficiently gone back and edited the post. It looks like it was written by someone whose first language is not English. As for the comments, they are completely founded on a very solid foundation. All except one, apparently I have meet Beth, but I completely forgot about it since she didn't spend any time talking to us at any of the events that we were at. As to the comment of selfishness, it stands. The only reason that Beth wants Meredith to go to family events is because she wants Meredith to be there. It is not good for Meredith to be there and she has expressed this. So, if it's bad for Meredith to be there when Pat is there, then anyone who says that Meredith should go anyway must not be looking out for Meredith's interests. Beth is also not looking out for Pat's best interest because if Meredith were to go to any of these events she would completely ignore Pat, so that leaves Pat feeling bad. So, now who is left? Only Beth. It is only for here own interest that she wants Meredith to be there, since she is the only one in this equation that would benefit. Sure the rest of the family might also benefit a little from getting to see Meredith, but it's not like most of you actually talk to her for more than 10 seconds at these events anyway. Why should she (Meredith) do something that causes her great pain in order for all of you to feel like everything is fine since the whole family is there? If you all really wanted to spend time with us, or even just Meredith, then all you would have to have done is let us know that. We have been to OKC many times over the last year, and almost every time Meredith has blogged about before we went, but not once has anyone ever suggested that if we had some time then we could get together. NOT ONCE!

To get back to the subject of this post, the answer to the question is easy. Selfishness is putting your own WANTS over someone else's NEEDS. Meredith NEEDS to stay away from her mother for reasons that you all don't know about. I know that you know the reasons because of the comments that you have made. They are so off base that you're in another ball park. None of you knows what is really the underlying issue. The very, very few people who do know the real issues are all in agreement that not seeing or talking to Pat is absolutely the best solution to the problem. It's not a short term problem either. It won't pass with time, and there is nothing that Meredith and I can do to change it, that is why we are simply avoiding it altogether.

If any of you ever do actually want to spend some time with us, then you should simply ask for that time with just you, and not at a family event where you know that Pat will likely be at.

I know that I am not being very gentle with this post and that some of you will be upset with me. But, my first responsibility is to my wife, not you. The only reason I left a comment in the first place is because as soon Meredith read the first couple of lines of Beth's comments to her she slammed her laptop closed and became very angry. I had to calm her down first and read the whole comment to her a little at a time so that she wouldn't get too upset. I posted because I knew that she wouldn't be able without coming across far more strongly than I did. Another thing about that post, she read it before it was submitted. In fact, she is the one that clicked the submit button. It would not have ever been posted if she didn't want it to be.

Later,

D

Breaking the Silence

2007-05-02T18:32:00.000-05:00

I have been very reluctant to say anything about why I am not talking to my mother. Mostly I have done this because I don't want everyone in the world to judge my mother solely based on what my experiences with her have been. And I'd rather my family judge me based on what they know of me, although that seems silly since most of them (at least my mother's siblings) seem to want to treat me like I'm a little child making silly decisions they don't like. For the record, I'm 26 and that treatment just makes me mad. I've been making adult decisions for at least 10 years now, and all the ones with long lasting results have turned out very well.

D left a short message about why I decided to stop talking to my mom on my aunt's blog. My family can access it if they want a few details, but I'm not going to give any more out here. My aunt's big complaint is that I'm denying my extended family the chance to see me because I refuse to even see my mother. She cares about me, I know, but she wanted to give out advice on a topic that she doesn't know the full story on and did so in a public way, which I think really got under D's skin and mine too. And what most of my family doesn't realize is that as much as they are hurt by this decision, it hurts me even more to not see them. But I'm willing to pay that price, because my sanity and my sense of peace is worth far more to me.

So, while my family may miss me, and wonder when they will see me again, I am missing most of them about as much. I'm not selfish enough to ask that they have a get together and not invite my mother, I think that would be terribly rude of me. And I'm just asking that they will understand that I've made my grown up decision to follow the Bible (Hebrews 12:14 says to follow peace and Romans 14:19 says to follow after the things which make for peace) and follow peace.

That is all I have to say. Thank you for reading.

TTFN!

Buying Luggage

2007-04-29T19:42:00.000-05:00

D and I went out today and bought luggage. We now have matching luggage, which is a first for us. But we really needed some before going to Florida next month. Now I just have to find a swimsuit. It's nice to say that. And the luggage is red, so it will stick out more than the old luggage we had (that didn't match).

I can also recommend Find Me Guilty for those who want to watch something funny. It stars Vin Diesel (now with hair!), and is based on a true story. I think that D liked the movies I picked this time at Blockbuster. My choices improved (of course, it wasn't any more expensive for us to pick bad movies than good ones, so we're trying more movies out now), at least in his opinion. We're trying more of the independent films now too.

Okay, I'm going to go now.

TTFN!

I Had Fun!

2007-04-28T22:31:00.000-05:00

Okay, I would imagine everyone is a little tired of me talking about how I'm feeling physically. I'm a little tired of it too (or is it that I'm just tired?). Today, I had fun with my friend. We went out to eat (D too). We got to show her our new house (D was going to stop by and water, but the lady who is watching the place was there, so we got to show off the inside too). My friend and I watched a couple of movies (she napped during one, because she got up at 4 this morning). Then D took her home, and I rested because my energy drained while we watched the second movie. But I was up-right and out of bed from 9:30 a.m. until almost 6 p.m., so that was good.

I had lots of fun today, but it was nice to rest and relax after it was over. Since that is so much fun, I think I'll get back to it.

TTFN!

I'm Feeling Better

2007-04-27T22:24:00.000-05:00

Okay, I admit, that isn't the truth. I'm feeling much, much better! And I didn't really do anything today. I did make it to Blockbuster (if you haven't seen Man of the Year, I recommend it). And I took a bath just a little while ago, but that's pretty much it. I did have a little time earlier during the day where I felt completely crappy, but most of the day I've felt pretty good. I did take it pretty easy, mostly because I have plans tomorrow with a friend from college (not last semester), and I wanted to ensure that I would be up for it. I watched most of The Price is Right (and remembered why it's only good if you don't feel good). I watched The People's Court, and heard it when the sound actually came through (or rather the static stopped).

I am looking forward to tomorrow. It will be nice to go celebrate my degree (D and I kind of celebrated it at New Year's), and she's promised to pay. We have absolutely no idea what we're doing except eating, but we'll figure something out. There is a part of me that's hoping it won't be walking around the mall, but that's mostly because there will be a ton of people there (since it'll be Saturday).

Okay, I'm off to do crosswords and day dream about tomorrow.

TTFN!

Blah, Blah, Blah

2007-04-26T18:50:00.000-05:00

After finishing the colonics I can say one thing very definitely: I feel tired. My body seems to adjust to getting rid of toxins by wanting to sleep for a day and a half (or at least lay around and not do anything. And I'm running a slight fever (very slight). But D has told me that he is very proud of me (on all three days he's said that). And I do feel better, just tired.

I did discover, quite by accident the other day, that the TV in my bedroom gets some of the channels on it very fuzzily. I get about 5 channels that would come in much clearer with rabbit ears, but should help entertain me tonight while D is out. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be up to going by Blockbuster to help pick out movies for the ones mailed to us. And I think that and maybe some laundry will be all that I will do tomorrow.

I'm going to go now.

TTFN!

P.S.: I should have real television watching capabilities in about 2 months, I think.

I'm Feeling...

2007-04-25T19:58:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm ready for it to be tomorrow, at the very least. I'm not feeling terrible, but I'm tired and don't feel all that wonderful right now. I do believe that I'm healthier now than I was two days ago, but I'm ready to be done. D and I have a Mr. Goodbar to split tomorrow to celebrate being done.

I really don't have anything else to say. The colonics have kind of taken up all my time and energy the past two days. Other than that, I've mostly just relaxed.

TTFN!

How to Describe the Past 24 Hours

2007-04-23T19:57:00.001-05:00

I can sum it up in one word: interesting.

D's parents (read D's mom) decided to e-mail us (well, mostly D). There wasn't really an apology, not that I'm surprised, just that they have been trying to understand us. I'm mostly going to let D deal with that (he is going to e-mail them back, but I think I'll read what he has to say first).

We're moving forward on stuff with the house, which is all I'll say for that until it's a done deal.

And tomorrow, D and I are getting colonics. And then we're getting them Wednesday and Thursday too. I'm trying hard not to think about it. But it did include us drinking something called Magnesium Citrate (grape flavored) to empty us out. I didn't care for the flavor (seemed sour to me), but it wasn't horrible. I'm not sure that I'm going to want to eat much this week.

So, all I can do is think it's been interesting (at least if I want to remain thinking positive thoughts).

I'm going to go now.

TTFN!

Greetings From Arkansas!

2007-04-21T22:17:00.000-05:00

D and I are spending a couple of days visiting my dad. It's nice. We got here close to noon and D helped plant trees in the back yard. I sat inside the house and stayed far out of the way, which is helpful in a different way. Then we visited for a while. My dad took us all out to eat. He told me that my burger (we went to get burgers) sounded good, and he would have to try it sometime (more so, the three cheeses on top, I would imagine). Then we came back to their house and have enjoyed visiting quite a bit for most of the evening.

It's nice to get out of the house for a little bit. And I always enjoy getting to spend time with my dad and step-mom. I'm pretty sure that D even enjoys himself fully while we are here, even if he wishes we would go somewhere and walk more (he's gotten much better about sitting for hours at a time since leaving his job).

I'm going to go read the book I've got off my dad's shelf. I'm getting close to finishing it.

TTFN!

Getting Closer to Moving

2007-04-20T13:47:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, in my desire to write about what interesting things D had said during the evening, I forgot to mention the wonderful things that happened that day in regard to getting us closer to owning our next home. We found out that the contract should be faxed soon (it was supposed to come last night, but didn't). In fact, the current owners want to add a clause to it to protect us, they are willing to pay up to $1000 for any damages we find when we get ownership (within a certain time frame, I'm sure). Of course, there shouldn't be any damages since they've just remodeled and updated most of the house. And we have an appointment Monday afternoon to start signing papers for our loan. So, while there will still be a little time before we're moving, we're starting to see some headway (in less than a week).

Okay, I'm off to check the mail.

TTFN!

Things D has Said Tonight

2007-04-19T23:48:00.000-05:00

"Come to bed soon dear, it's almost midnight." (less than a minute ago)

"I'm going to win." (while we were teaching other people how to play our game)

"I'm known in my house for..." (the ellipses were because I interrupted him with, you're known in our house?) "... getting out and rolling the six I need to win." (There are two parts to the board game. I've done well at getting out of the first part quickly. But then he gets out of that first part before I win the second part and lands on a square that wins him the game. Then he gloats about it.)

"Meredith hates it when I do that." (Talking about rolling the six to win. And who likes it when someone wins and then gloats?)

It's been a good, if somewhat long evening. A game that normally takes D and I about 2 hours to play took almost 4 tonight. Of course, there were 3 other people, 2 of whom had never played before. I'm somewhat tired, but happy to be back home. I'm thinking that we need to set a time to end next time we play, so that it doesn't go so long. I won, but the chairs started getting uncomfortable around 3 hours in.

I'm going to go. I'm debating if I want a heating pad on my back when I'm still really warm.

TTFN!

P.S.: D, I apologize for gloating most of the way home. You took it well. And I did tell you that I was going to win. ;)

I'm Just Me

2007-04-18T23:47:00.000-05:00

D and I spent a little while hashing out a schedule for him. Mostly so that I'll know when I get to spend time with him and when I don't. It's nice, because it will help both of us figure out what to do each day. And I still get most of his attention at least two days a week (he's attempting to take two days a week off). I understand why he's working so hard right now, but it helps me when I know that I can pull him away from work at a designated time each day. That way we can achieve a better balance between him working to earn us money and us still having a relationship. The past week has pointed out to me that we haven't done that well.

So, starting fully next week, D and I will attempt to have a set schedule for at least him. I'll let you know how well that works.

Maybe tomorrow D and I could try to figure out how to post some pictures of my future kitchen.

TTFN!

Change Is in the Air

2007-04-17T12:43:00.000-05:00

As I read blogs by my family and look at my own life, I realize that change is in the air. I have 3 cousins who are going to expand their families with children. And I learned that my dad and step-mom are looking to expand theirs (and mine) by adopting. D and I are looking at moving in a few months, and we are trying to get me pregnant. One of my pregnant cousins is moving too. All this change, all for the better, is happening somewhat quickly. And I'm still reeling a little bit from the idea of becoming a big sister again (I'm happy, just slightly shocked).

Tonight, we're helping one of the current owners of our soon to be new house return her rental car. Tomorrow morning, D will take her to the airport. We're hoping to hear from her about what is up with the contract, if she knows, because we haven't heard anything from her husband. And it seems odd that D and I are planning for having kids when I'm not pregnant yet. But it's good to plan ahead, and that's what we are doing. We've got a room picked out to be a nursery, when that actually becomes important. We've figured out where I'll set up the bills and all my other stuff (at the wet bar in the living room, because it will give me plenty of room to do so. We're making so many plans, and I'm ready to get things going on this.

And with all this change in the air, I'm suffering from some slightly mixed emotions. Happiness is always right on top, but there is this longing for things to stay the same, which commonly seems to accompany change for me. And once I move, I'll feel better and wonder why there was a part of me that didn't want the change.

So, for now, I'm excited for everyone else, and mostly excited for me too.

TTFN!

P.S.: I love my new house!!!!!

Today Has Been...

2007-04-15T22:41:00.000-05:00

Today has been monumental, important, and exciting. Pretty much from the start.

I woke up, dragged myself out of bed, and talked to D about my dream. Then I checked e-mail and read comics/blogs until lunch. Then I watched a DVD with D about a company (real estate related). Then D and I went to the open house for the house we are in love with. And tomorrow, we'll have a contract on it and possibly the financing. I'm getting the big, beautiful house that I'm in love with! We'll be moving in the next few months.

Then, D and I traded in our movies at Blockbuster and watched Stranger Than Fiction. If you haven't seen this movie, you have to rent it. It starts off a little slow, but it is hilarious and moving. D started to enjoy it after we saw about the first 20 or 30 minutes of it. I enjoyed it from the beginning, but I think it was because I could tell it was going to be hilarious just as soon as some of the background got established. It's mostly a comedy, but there is some romance in it too. D and I have realized we can be less picky about what we rent now that it is one set fee a month (as long as we abide by three at a time, except when we have a coupon for a fourth).

So, I'm on an excited buzz for things working out really well right now.

Okay, I'm going to go talk to D some more, because we haven't spent much time talking the past two days.

TTFN!

My Day

2007-04-14T19:38:00.000-05:00

Some days can't be described. Some days shouldn't be. I don't know which this one is, but I have no words for it. And that's not necessarily a bad thing.

I'm going to go watch American Beauty with D now.

TTFN!

Things I Don't Need to Re-Learn

2007-04-13T22:42:00.000-05:00

D and I ordered a DVD from Blockbuster that was about improving your marriage. We figure that even a great marriage can be improved, because we are still human. We already knew and did everything that was talked about, and didn't really get anything from the DVD. Okay, I got a few interesting mental images, but that was about it. It's good information, but we already had it. And it echoed a lot of the information in His Needs, Her Needs, which D and I went over at Christmas and might go over again around our anniversary. I guess I could say that it helped me understand D a little better, but I already kind of knew this stuff already.

And watching the DVD kept me entertained while D was off at a real estate thing. Which is important (me being kept entertained... and D's real estate stuff too).

Okay, I'm going to go back to talking with D, because it's fun.

TTFN!

P.S.: D would probably encourage all men to talk and pay attention to their wives for at least 30 minutes a day. I agree with that sentiment.